A Rant About the Pharmaceutical Industry

I had recently been asking my followers on Google + if they had heard anything  about a shortage of Cymbalta, the medication I am on for depression. I was out of it all last week (didn't have the money for the high co pay that may insurance charges for brand name medications).


I go my pharmacy Sunday, and all they were able to give me was a 3 day supply of it, they said they were short of it, and that more should be in the next day. I kept checking everyday to see if more was in, and each day, the answer was no. That 3 day supply ran out Tuesday, and tonight, I finally asked them what was going on, if it was a problem just with this pharmacy, or every pharmacy was struggling to get more in this area.

The answer from the pharmacy tech really made me mad, not at her, but at the company Eli Lilly, which produces it. Because their patent is about to expire on Cymbalta, and a generic will soon hit the market, they are cutting the supplies of it, because they don't want to be stuck with large stockpiles of it, that they can't sell (due to people switching to the cheaper generic).

I understand them not wanting to lose money that way, but why can't they keep up with supplies until the generic hits the market? There are people depending on this medication to keep functioning in life, and there are people far worse off than I am.

Lottery Balls and Superheros

It’s been 10 days on Cymbalta now, and it seems like it has taken full effect already (see my last post A Full Bottle of Pills and an Empty Wallet if you haven’t already). It was rather fortunate timing that I got on the medication when I did, because due to some circumstances beyond my control, I can’t access my Google + or Blogger account very often (I won’t discuss it publicly, but I’ll let some of my Google + fans know what is going on in the next few days). Between that, and the many hours I have been putting into rebuilding the house I may only be able to log on 2-4 times a month from now on.

It’s highly disappointing, my followers both on the blog and on Google + have been a great support to me over the past year as I have opened up about my past, and my current life. I feel like a recovering alcoholic that can’t get to their AA meetings. The lack of support would have truly caused me to lose what little I have left of my sanity had it not been for the medication. It’s made a world of difference in my life.

The chronic fatigue I used to deal with is gone, I still don’t have the energy levels that someone who is 24 years old should have, but I can wake up in the mornings fairly easily, and I don’t feel tired all the time. The pain and stiffness has been greatly reduced, I don’t get the stiffness in my arms and legs anymore, and the pain in my lower back has been greatly reduced, I don’t usually notice it unless I have been moving around a lot that day.

One of the best aspects of being on Cymbalta is that I now not only don’t have to deal with the physical symptoms hardly at all, but my mind has calmed down quite a bit. MY mind used to race all the time, all these conflicting thoughts trying to process all at once, competing for my attention, causing anxiety, making me worry that in all the chaos, I was going to end up forgetting something along the way, and leading to a lot of obsessive habits.

 If you could have looked inside my mind at the time, it would have looked something like when the numbered balls bounce around in the round plastic container during a bingo game or a lottery drawing, thoughts bouncing around, crashing into each other, just like those white plastic balls, so loud and chaotic, and hard to watch. I’m so glad I don’t have to deal with that anymore. I’m still somewhat obsessive (occasionally I still pace back and forth, which annoys people to no end, but not nearly as often), but my mind is so much clearer, my memory actually works, and I’m so much calmer. The Cymbalta has given me what fundamentalism always promised but never delivered on: peace of mind.