Undercover Agnostic (Update 10): Closure

 The wait is over. I have won the bidding war that I talked about in Update 9. I went to the real estate agency today and gave them a $500 cashier's check addressed to HUD, and signed several lines on about 12 pages of paperwork to make it official.

After some more bureaucracy, paperwork, a 30 day wait for closing procedures (and paying the remainder of the purchase price). I will have a house.

I don't really feel elated or victorious, I just feel a sense of closure. As I was driving up to the real estate office, the song We Are the Champions by the 70's band Queen came on the radio, and the opening lines really struck me as a perfect description of the last 5 years:

I've paid my dues time after time

I've done my sentence but committed no crime 

And bad mistakes, I've made a few  

I've had my share of sand kicked in my face  

But I've come through 

An awful era of my life is coming to close, and I'll have to start over. Be mindful of my past, and what I have been through and learned, but learn to forgive and how to set boundaries with people to keep it from happening again.

I've told some details of my life, both about my life now and my childhood, (read here, here, and here), but there are some details, especially about the last 5 years that I still haven't been able to bring myself to write about. I may start spilling more details in the next months as I start over in life.

 I'l be busy, there will be a work to be done on this house, it's a new day, a new opportunity, there are many plans to be made, especially in the next months as I plan to finally come out as agnostic. The time will come when I'll be ready to give up the necessary charade that I have had to keep up for the last 3 years. I'm ready to start living openly, despite the consequences that will come. The day will come soon, very soon.